Nobody!’ Donovan seemed to reel as if punched, and Jen continued, ‘Don’t take this away from me, just because it doesn’t seem right to you! You made it ‘wrong’ because you wouldn’t let _me_ have a normal life, and now you want to take what I do have away! Do you hate me because I’m not like you? Is that it?’ Jen sounded as if she were losing her composure, close to tears. Reaching out, Jahn laid a reassuring hand on her shoulder. Something like panic replaced the darkness and hostility on Donovan’s face, and Jahn was reminded again of the odd mix of love and hate at war inside the man, as if he were some sort of mutant representation of that yin/yang business. Leaning forward, the man spoke urgently into the phone, indiscernible chatter nearly an octave higher than his usual base rumble. Reassurance. Letting her know he did love her. Trying to fix the colossal fuck up that had been his interference in his daughter’s life and was now threatening to take the one thing he did love in. Once I had my own apartment, I began to experiment a little more. I started off by getting several pair of panties. I always wore them at home, never out anywhere. I was too scared that someone would know.After a while, I’d take an occasional brief excursion out while wearing panties – never very long or very far from home. It just always felt so thrilling to do that, but I worried about someone finding out. After a while, I bought a bra, then two or three. I only ever wore those at home, and would fill them with socks or something to make it look like I really had boobs.I never wore the bras out of the apartment. I just knew if I did that someone would know and would humiliate me, call me a sissy, or worse. Gradually I got a little more daring. I went to thrift stores and bought a few skirts, blouses, and dresses, along with nice shoes – flats at first, later heels. I never wore any of that out of the house.I let my hair grow longer, but lots of guys did. I just made sure to keep it.
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